Biggest Tool Ever Insults Business Cards & Promises to “Build Crowds”

Who is this turd? Joel Bauer? He’s so insecure and arrogant it’s like driving past an accident scene… you can’t help but watch with horror. “He builds crowds… guaranteed.”

Yeah, Captain Small Penis. You gather crowds. So does a guy with a severed head in his hand, hanging from the 30th floor of a building. And that’s just about as appetizing to watch.

Glad I could share. Thanks Jan. Happy Halloween.

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12 Comments

  1. This guy is playing a character. I think the idea for this was taken from a scene in the movie American Psycho (2000 starring Christian Bale). In the scene, business cards are exchanged, and much is made of their quality and expense. This whole character is kind of a riff on the stuff in American Psycho.

  2. Geez, if it took him 25 years to design the card, I wonder if it’ll take him another 25 to develop a personality that’s not annoying. Hmmm.

    Not sure if he’s real or not, but he was on the MTV’s Fantasy Factory show trying to motivate that skater guys employees. He basically goes over the same schpeel and then some.

    click the linky

  3. Joel Bauer is a master at persuading large groups of people to exchange their money for goods and services, at live events.

    I’ve seen him live several times and IMO he’s one of the best.

    If you’re offended by someone who is successful at selling hard, you’ll never like Joel. He’s probably ok with that.

    BTW, where are all the business cards you’ve been handed over the last year? Bundled inside a rubber band?

  4. *hint hint* You could adopt his cutting (should I use the word bleeding instead?) edge haircut.

    He looks like a crazy marketer! Time for a new video character, Nalts!

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