Weird News Unrelated to Online-Video Marketing

I always liked Weird News, and used to syndicate it for a local newspaper in Georgetown. That means I pulled it down from the wire, laid it out, and added a photo of a squirrel when necessary. Hey it sounds easy, but those weren’t the desktop publishing days, damnit. I used hot wax.

This guy needs the sugar and caffeine

So here, unrelated to the primary purpose of this blog (whatever that is) are some weird news items I’ve culled from 409 different sources.

  • A body of a woman was found in a Disney World parking lot. That body, of course, was dead.
  • A dead body was found on top a moving truck. It was not Andy Rooney.
  • A new toy, Fijit Fiends, is a best-selling Halloween decoration.
  • 60 Elvises fled from a fire. If I was a pun fan, I’d link to this video. I’m not.
  • A French teacher forces a student to inform her of a bathroom fire in French (The Onion). Allison should defense de fumer, non?
  • Smoking one marijuana joint can give you schizophrenia.
  • A book of bone houses. How comforting to sleep beneath deceased human remains.

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Weird & Unusual Weather Reports of the Week

"Modern Family" Gloria Delgado-Pritchett look-alike shows grace under pressure during earthquake weather segment

It’s been a weird week for weather reporting. What’s the most unusual report of these three? Or perhaps you’d like to pick from my personally hand-curated most epic weather people fails (below).

a) Gloria Delgado-Pritchett look-alike Jeannette Calle was recording her Accuweather report when the earthquake hit yesterday at 1:51pm ET. To see her graceful preamble click here, but the video below cuts right to the shake and “my heart was pounding.”

b) Our local Philadelphia meteorologist Jim Kosek focused mostly on his chiropractic condition, and his only relief from Advil and a soda. Then he tossed in some weather. Here’s another vintage/insane Kosek report.

c) Sorry, the third choice isn’t actually from this week, but it’s timeless and wonderful. The weatherman who has a screaming panic attack of a cock roach…

If you like these, you may also like these epic weather fails:weather guy has diarrhea on air,” “drunk weather guy,” “Tourette weather man,” “giggling weatherman after dogs hump,” “your isobars make me horny,” “pollin shit continues,” “doctor weather mute,” “phallic weather patterns,” “Child-molester chroma,” “giggling German weather lady,” “Diana are you hitting a button (bad weather fill-in).” 


Weirdest CES Photos

Our anonymous “roving photographer” sent us some of the weirdest photos from CES (Consumer Electronic Show). Enjoy…

A collection of weird photos from CES today (via Flickr)

Weirder Book Comments Anyone?

So the book site (BeyondViral) is pretty darned live for this weeks’ official release.

From now on, if you put your hands in this position you're stealing intellectual property.

Now c’mon WillVideoForFood “backrowers.” You’ve done majestically on Amazon’s ratings. Let’s show David M. Scott (he’s like the Fred of social media) how fun people respond to blogs. He and Steve Garfield helped get me into Wiley’s New Rules for Social Media, and he’s blogged about Beyond Viral. Who’s got some comment humor in him. Rumor has it even Sukatra’s got WVFF access from her phone.

Who wants to read thoughtful reactions to literature? I’m guessing David M. Scott has never experienced a mathematical correction from Alexis (apparently “exponential” is not what I think), a bowel joke from Nutcheese or a Reubnick quip. Jan’s probably got a funky political angle. Here’s hoping Marquisdejolie links back one of his bazaar videos, a term I’d use more often but for Maryln. What ya got Punchy, Zack, Coffin, JimmerSD? How about my sisters and bro? They visit. Really.

I got a few notes that the book is in stores, which tells me either:

  • This isn’t some elaborate prank on me, or a dream.
  • Or that I’m still dreaming

Wow. I blog in my dreams? That’s kinda lame.

Amazon sent me a gift certificate for free copies, but I think I’m going to use it to buy a remote-controlled airplane toy with a video camera instead.

Illegal Drugs

No I’m not sure if this is promoting or vilifying illegal drug use. But I’m not sure it matters.

This weirdly repetitive music gets stuck in your ear like a maggot in a festering puss wound while you’re traveling in search of El Dorado in the Amazon in the 1910s without any medication.

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Who Won the Cheese? Weird Comments.

american cheeseIt took almost two months of deliberation, but our judges have selected the honorable mentions and winner of the “Weird Comment” contest, which boasts a grand prize of an autographed slice of American cheese.

As you won’t likely recall, back on January 5, 2008, I invited you to post the weirdest comments on this TechCrunch article about my book. There are a about 50 plus comments on my invitation post too (see them).

You took the challenge, and you delivered. That’s why we spent so long deliberating. It is not because we forgot or anything.

Click “more” below to see the 33 weirdest comments. Honorable mention also goes to Maryln and Sukatra’s back ‘n forth.

It’s a tough call, but here’s the winner. Johnny, whoever you are, send your address. We’ll send the cheese.

  1. Johnny January 7th, 2008 at 4:22 pm

    WARNING I DID NOT START THIS SPAM ok susie was going to a river where she watched the school of dogs dissecting cats that could fly because of their lung cancer thus enabling the time portal to pull down the trigger that made the lever go down into Narnia which was currently in a war against the Summer Queen who made eternal summer, when the summer queen was vanquished Fred came to save the day transporting all living babies in the world to travel first class to Funkytown singing Funkytowwwwwn the whole way there the babies enjoyed their sparkling white grape juice which made them all fart Beethovens Ninth backwards making them change each others pampers for a milenium until two magical beavers came and started to shop at wal-mart because of it having the lowest prices they bought firewood to burn the Ohio River therefore making Lisa Nova drinking an 8 ounce glass of water flexing her liver making it break thus powering all of new york city for the rest of the year making arnold schwargentator happy to be alive until the terminator kills him everyone is living happily except George Bush since lisa novas liver broke and two squirrels from sydney come in to kidnap president lincoln holding him as ransom for 70 nuts or walnuts making the world fall in the Great Depression 2 thus starting war against switzerland because of all of the obese people in america wanting it’s magical chocolate mines causing them to get more obese and starting weight watchers to gain even more weight causing the worlds rotation to end effecting into the sun being blocked by an enormous bottle sun tan lotion sold by an eskimo in iceland causing a humonguos meteor to fall into austrailia and killing all of the worlds opera singers thus making everyone happy again and then everyone died except nalts, he lived. (run-on consider revising)

(Select “more” below to see some favorites).

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