iPhone4G Press Conference Parody

Oh hush. What it lacks in humor it makes up for in timeliness. Let’s see you put an iPhone4G in your butt for the Internet. Or drive into the backyard of some crazy person so you can get near a cell phone tower.

My favorite quote of Steve Jobs: .55 percent of iPhone4G users complained. Seriously? Common C’mon. I had prooblems (despite the video statement) but knew better than to sit on hold. Besides- I’m guessing the other 99% just dropped their call before Apple answered.

Well there are many things Apple does well, but damage control or issue management is not among them.

Yey free 2 cent bumper iPhone condoms and they’ll even honor that 30-day money back guarantee! Weeks later Jobs will be reporting that fewer than .55 percent of people felt like he didn’t do a perfect job handling this issue, so if you thought otherwise, you’d better log your complaint.

Online Video & SEO

I don’t often quote press releases, but this release by Vmatrix is quite accurate:

Two hottest trends in online marketing – streaming video and video SEO – will take off in popularity in 2009. According to online marketing studies, Google’s universal search algorythms, which allow multimedia to appear in search results along with web page links, will change the look of Google search results. More video links and thumbnail images of video links will be seen on Google because more people are searching for video than website content.

I trust that marketers will start posting video content on YouTube if only to help SEO rankings. It works, and in fact Google (not surprisingly) is rather kind to video. Not only do my videos get indexed quickly for terms, but my thumbnail (the image) appears on results. You can’t buy that kind of attention using paid-search ads (remember the eye-trackers show that more than 80% of the attention goes to organic rankings not ads, and ads don’t permit images).

Helicopter Dildo Interrupts Press Conference

It’s been quite a while since I bashed Break.com, and the site has earned new status in my mind. I usually passively review Break.com clips people pass me, but today I went on my own little hunt. I’ve since found this clip documented on Waxy.org (it’s Gary Kasparov, the chess grand master).

Helicopter Dildo viral video of press conferenceI was pleasantly surprised to find this delightful clip of a helicopter dildo disrupting a press conference. I thought it was too perfect to be truly candid, but the reactions (including the security guy that punches the poor flying wiener to its demise) convinced me.

Folks, get yourself your own remote-controlled helicopter dildo and try it yourself. A wedding, funeral or office meeting. The possibilities are endless.

Don’t get me wrong. I love vlogging, collaboration videos, skits and even creative advertisements. But very little can top a flying remote-controlled dildo helicopter buzzing over the heads of annoyed professionals.