Tag Archives: porn

YouTube

Porn and Whatnot (How to Tag Your Way to the Top!)

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Guest blog by Alan Lastufka (FallofAutumnDistro), video creator, emo, blogger and author of the forthcoming “YouTube: An Insider’s Guide to Climbing the Charts.”

Alan FallofautumndistroWhen uploading a new video to YouTube, or any other video-sharing site, you need to give a few pieces of information to the site because encoding software can’t actually watch your videos. Your title is important for tricking viewers into watching (they’ll think your video will be more interesting than it probably really is). Your description is important for whoring out links and shout-outs to other channels.

But your tags… your tags are where the real magic happens. Your tags are keywords used to place and rank your video within YouTube’s search results.

Even better, just like your video’s title, thumbnail and description, your tags — or keywords associated with your video — can be easily manipulated or gamed! Adding popular search words like “porn,” “sex,” “naked” and “guitar hero” to your video’s tags will give you a bump in views over the long run. In addition to appealing to the fourteen-year-old perverts, you could also include tags from recent popular news stories. Favorites this past week would have been “Bernie”, “Mac” and “RIP.” Users searching for news clips about an actor’s recent death would hopefully find your video waiting for them at the top of the search results.

Most users only tag their own channel name, or repeat the video’s title in their tags section. Get out of this habit now! You could be luring in a much larger audience if you only knew what they were searching for, and including those words in your tags.

For a list of the daily most popular search terms click here: http://google.com/trends

Also, if you’re lucky enough for your video to be monetized, your tags not only help pop your video into popular search results, but may determine which ads are placed beside and within your videos.

If you notice a cell phone company *cough*SamSung Instinct*cough* is spending a lot of money on a site-wide ad campaign, tagging the video with phone, electronics, or the product itself could help pull in some of that sweet Google ad revenue (assuming you’re a YouTube partner).

Okay…I’ve been taking an overly-sarcastic tone throughout this article. All of the above taken into account, it is a good idea for most content creators to make better use of their tags.

But for the love of koolsurfer24, please keep them relevant and appropriate for your video’s content. If your latest video documents your weekend fishing trip, don’t just leave “fishing” as your lone tag, include “boat”, “bait”, “catch”, “release”, “lake”, “fish”, “sport”, “tackle” and everything else related that you can think dream up.

Don’t try to cheat the rankings. Don’t game the system. Gamed views will only leave you feeling empty at the end of the day, can get you kicked off some sites, and at best, will get you a bad rep.

Alan Lastufka is on YouTube, BlogTV and occasionally writes for
his own blog, ViralVideoWannabe. Alan is currently writing a book entitled
“YouTube: An Insider’s Guide to Climbing the Charts” for O’Reilly Media, Inc.

book, Online Video

So You Want to Be Social-Media Cool?

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I’m going to give you a free social-media makeover here, folks. I may not live in social media Heaven, but I’ve had a few “follow the bright light” moments, and have returned with some important messages from Above.

  1. First- get on Twitter. Microblogging short sentences from the web or your text-enabled phone may seem pointless, but that’s only if you haven’t learned to “follow” anyone who has a cooler life than you. Lie about what you’re doing so people don’t think you’re pathetic. I have more than 1,000 people following me, so that gives my life meaning.
  2. Now up the game with 12secondtv.com. Follow me. I’ve found I can make 12-second videos from my cell phone while driving. No pesky editing.
  3. Start ChaCha’ing instead of Googling remotely. Just text any question to 242242, and you get an instant answer. Sometimes they’re not in the mood to write back, but it’s still fun to say.
  4. Text. Seriously if you don’t text you might as well buy a Brother typewriter and get off the computer. SMS stands for short message um.. something. And then there’s MMS or something. It’s for multimedia. Just text. Or RSS.
  5. Oh, you think you’re better than me because you’ve been texting for ages? Well screw off. I Jott. You heard me. I call a toll-free number and it transcodes my speech to text for free. Jott can send my spoken words as text to wordpress or twitter or to my administrative assistant Sandy.
  6. Get iwantsandy. Have no idea what the hell Sandy does, but she’s an administrative assistant. And my real admin happens to be a woman who works in the union and also is named Sandy. She likes crystals. The electronic Sandy has a retro logo.
  7. Join vloggerheads. You need an invite, and so you’d better contact Nutcheese or someone cool. This is Renetto’s mutiny from YouTube. I showed up yesterday and it was like an insanity floor for disturbed YouTubers. They gave me some orange pills and made me right at home.
  8. Join Amazon Prime. You get free two-day shipping not to mention social status. Just drop on Twitter or Vloggerheads and say “yeah- I’m Amazon Prime.” What are you? Amazon Light? Whatever. Oh by the way- I get 12 dollars if you join from this link, and there’s a 1 month free trial. Just shut up and join.
  9. Join iamintown. Oh sorry- that’s in a special beta release. You’ll have to wait.
  10. Play with FriendFeed. Mine is kinda sparse but you can check out Steve Rubel’s (he’s the vlogger behind micropersuasion). Steve Rubel is on top of new trends even if he doesn’t link to me anymore.
  11. Watch some of the live shows on blogtv.com. I’m on Sunday nights at 9. Here’s my new account (Nalts) but 105 people are subscribed to my RealNalts account, which I had created when I couldn’t get Nalts.

That’s all you can handle right now. From your perspective, Jott will be a game changer. From my perspective, I just want you to join Amazon Prime because I’ve made about $4 in the past three months on my DVD sales, t-shirts, and stupid ads on kevinnalts.com. You don’t think I’m blogging for f’ing fun do you? Shit I need some flashy porn banners on this blog.