eBaums Features My Worst Video Ever… L33t Dwarf Horses

eBaums featured my worst video ever a few hours ago. It’s called “l33t dwarf horses,” and it’s a parody of “Internet gaming speak.” It was inspired by DigitalPh33r (see recent post on him). For more about l33t, see this Wikipedia entry. Or the Urban Dictionary version of it.

eBaums must have ripped the video from some website, and posted it. So I just set up my own Nalts account, posted the same video, and asked them to provide correct attribution.

Then again, with 224 scathing comments (in just four hours) and a 1/5 star rating, maybe I don’t want credit…

It’s Your Fault if You’re Bored Online

tilzy.tv tracks episodic online video contentNow it’s your fault if you’re bored online and can’t find anything good to watch (besides Nalts crap).

Tilzy.tv aggregates and lists a lot of the top episodic programming, and may especially helpful as a transition drug to online-video. Especially for you noobs who still think television is more interesting.

The name, branding and tagline “guide to television on the web” a oddly retro, but that’s the point we suppose.

Good content as well as stories, like this recent news about Rabbit Bites getting sponsored by Purina. You go, Bunns and Chou Chou!

Top Secret YouTube Tricks & Hacks

Okay maybe “top secret” is an over statement, but most readers of this post will find a few surprises here. I give you some of the lesser known tricks on YouTube to optimize your experience as a viewer or creator…

  1. Find Best Videos on YouTube
    Don’t surf the homepage or most-recently uploaded section if you want to find the best videos. There are two places to go… the “top rated” section and the “most viewed.” I prefer the latter, because the community decides what’s lands there. Note that some creators live on this page because their fans rate them 5 stars without fail, so it’s not all good. There are also a few people that are “gaming the system” by artificially rating themselves 5 stars with sock accounts or autobots (boo, hiss). If you like vloggers, check the “most discussed” section of “People and Blogs.” You can also surf the “most subscribed” creators (by category) and when you find someone good (say, for example, Nalts) be sure to subscribe. Then visit your subscription page first, which is like an RSS for new videos by your favorite creators.
  2. Watch Blocked Videos.
    See previous post on this blog to see how to hack YouTube if a video’s URL is blocked by your ISP.
  3. See “Recently Deleted” Videos.
    Delutube and ReviveTube allow you to find deleted videos if you know the 11-digit URL. Source: ReelPopBlog.
  4. Make Your Videos Upoad Faster.
    Apparently SpeedBit Video VideoAccelorator makes YouTube videos load more quickly. It works for other sites as well (see site details at Accelorator.com).
  5. Upload to YouTube and a Bunch of Other Sites at Once.
    I use TubeMogul whenever I want to upload beyond YouTube on a mess ofwebsites including, currently, Yahoo!, MySpace, Metacafe, Google, Revver, DailyMotion, Blip.tv, Veoh, Crackle & StupidVideos.
  6. Reference a Video in Comments Section.
    You can post a URL in the comment section of videos, but you can provide the 11-digit alphanumeric code, and then people can post this before it:
  7. Get More Views on YouTube
    I’ve written a free eBook about how to promote yourself on YouTube (“How to Become Popular on YouTube Without Any Talent“), and there are other books including this 25-pager I haven’t read.
  8. Download YouTube Videos
    This is a post with some tips, but I like VideoBox from tastyapps.com (but it’s Mac only). KeepVid can download videos as FLV files pretty quickly. I’m also using Snapz Pro or Snagit to grab short sections of videos very quickly.
  9. Upload Videos for Best YouTube Quality
    For starters, you gotta export your videos in the best resolution possible — that means making them larger files (mine are 100 megs or more) and ensuring all the specifications are YouTube friendly. Trippy’s blog covers these specs well. Some argue that it’s best to convert it to an FLV per YouTube specifications before uploading, but I don’t like the idea of sending YouTube anything compressed so tightly.
  10. Subscribe to Someone When You Can’t.
    YouTube accounts without videos don’t have a “subscribe” option. To get around this (or to make it easy for people to subscribe to you), use this code, substituting the profile name where I have “Nalts.”

What did I miss? I’m updating this!

Appear Better Informed About Darfur in 3 Minutes: The Onion Makes Me Cry

Darfur. We both know how serious it is, but we’re not sure exactly why or where it is.

The Onion (helping you seem more informed”) has produced this fantastic parody of news analysis. It’s called “How Can We Let Darfur Know How Much We’re Doing For Them.”

picture-10.pngI’ve never laughed as much in preparing a post for this silly blog- in fact cried laughing (to use a bad pun). The Onion, I hope you know, is a website/print publication that has made the single finest transition to online-video content. The Onion News Network is as well written as the website I used to eagerly anticipate each Wednesday (in fact, it was literally the only website besides Google that I checked routinely in the early part of this century). But the acting is what cinches this. The acting is better than amateur online-video content, and most of television.

Watch each of these actors and realize how easy it is to believe that they’re real analysts and you’re not supposed to be laughing- the cadence, the off-camera glances, the “pile on” comments, and the timing. Folks if you’re watching, I’d kill for a cameo. No charge, and I’ll get their with 24-hours notice. 

The onion logoAccording to Wikipedia, (but watch out because The Onion reminds us Wikipedia is prone to error), The Onion launched The Onion News Network, a daily web video broadcast that had been in production since mid-2006. An early story featured an illegal immigrant taking an executive’s $800,000 a year job for $600,000 a year. The Onion has reportedly invested about $1 million in the production and has hired 15 new staffers to focus on the production of this video broadcast.[11] Carol Kolb, former editor-in-chief of The Onion, is the head writer.

In a Wikinews interview in November 2007, Onion President Sean Mills said the ONN has been a huge hit.

“We get over a million downloads a week, which makes it one of the more successful produced-for-the-Internet videos,” said Mills. “If we’re not the most successful, we’re one of the most.”

TheOnion has a YouTube account (with an atypical banner that allows viewers to drop directly into its podcasts, website or RSS) since March 2006, but its videos are all relatively new to YouTube (past several months). As of this post, I have about 35,000 subscribers on YouTube, and The Onion has about 13,000. I’m willing to bet that the network has twice as many subscribers as me by the summer.

I’ve often said that quasi professional content is on the rise, but this isn’t fair to call “quasi.” The only reason this content isn’t a better version of SNL is because there’s not enough of it, and perhaps it appeals to a smaller segment of the SNL audience with primarily news parody. Then again- it works for Jon Stewart.

See: FDA recalls pot pies because they’re hungry and the plight of lost hikers.

The Best of Cats on Skateboards (YouTube Advertising)

It’s the biggest myth of online-video advertising. If a brand advertises on YouTube it will appear with consumer-generated media that includes such content as cats on skateboarders. TVweek’s “New Media Minute,” hosted by Daisy Whitney, featured a recent interview with YouTube’s Jordan Hoffner to set the record straight (via WebVideoReport).

cats on skateboards on youtubeNaturally I couldn’t resist a parody that includes Hoffner’s “that never happens” quote in a montage of nostalgic ads mixed with cat’s skateboarding. Here’s hoping Hoffner can laugh at the parody. I’m a YouTube Partner (paid content creator), but I didn’t monetize this puppy, Jordan.

Media Stereotypes Online-Video Clichés

There’s no question that traditional media tends to characterize online video — and YouTube in particular — as a cute fad. Certainly the bulk of the stories are about the “one hit wonders,” Internet clichés, and sensational hits like Chris Crocker, Sneezing Pandas, laughing babies and Star Wars Kid.

When I saw some recent Comedy Central parodies, I actually got a little frustrated that comedy writers are captivated with the drama prairie dog, and misses the more interesting trends:

The boys on Southpark were right that the distribution channel is still far from a mature monetization model. But it’s getting more interesting and obviously an important trend and not a fad.

spoof of traditional media’s coverage of youtubeAs I was thinking about all this, I felt compelled to spoof my somewhat defensive reaction. So here’s me taking this argument to an absurd extreme. Attacking media for stereotypes, only to resort to groveling for an SNL deal with Lauren Michaels.

10 People Bought My DVD

Yey! Nine people bought my “Best of Nalts” DVD, which is precisely 8 more than I expected. Thank you:

  1. Damon (Maryland)
  2. Kimberley (Florida)
  3. Mattias (Sweden)
  4. Jason (New York)
  5. Krysta (Canada)
  6. Gordon (UK)
  7. Ian (England)
  8. James (Georgia)
  9. Diane (CT)

One of the problems about it is that you can’t select “play all.” Unfortunately, my Mac crashed and I lost the whole project so I can’t fix that. Thank goodness I produced the DVD, because some of those videos are gone except on this DVD and YouTube.

The quality is amazing, but people in general don’t like to pay for content they can get for free. So I didn’t expect to retire on this, much less cover my cell bill for a month.

Update: March 22. One more!

  • Robert R. (PA)

Buy “Best of Nalts” Video Shorts on High Definition DVD

Best of Nalts DVD SleevePer my post in December, I finally received and approved my proof of the “Best of Nalts: Volume 1” DVD. So now you can buy 71 minutes of Nalts videos (with 29 videos) on CreateSpace.com by clicking here.

I have nearly “comedic” 600 videos online for free, but I think these are the best ones (although a few of you pointed out a few that need to be high on the list for volume two). I avoided videos that were too YouTube centric like Renetto shaving my head, or other inside jokes. So most of these are family-friendly and don’t require any context to appreciate.

So buy your copy now for the low, low price of $19.94. Yey. My kids and their friends just gathered around to watch the proof DVD tonight, and it’s frightening how clear the quality is since most of them are high definition… especially when you’re used to seeing them in horribly compressed format on YouTube. You can actually read little things in the background, so I’m sure I’ve inadvertently left a credit card number visible. But unless I sell about 30,000 of these DVDs (and something tells me I’m lucky if I sell 50), those credit card numbers won’t be much worth to you.

To see the full list of videos, click “more” below. To see the sleeve in higher resolution, click the image on the right.

Click here to buy one for $19.94. Click here to watch ’em for free in low resolution and with annoying ads. 🙂

P.S. I priced mine exactly one penny below HappySlip‘s, and I make big $6.02 per copy sold.

Continue reading “Buy “Best of Nalts” Video Shorts on High Definition DVD”

YouTube Is My Life (Destined for Feature)

YouTube is My LifeI don’t think there’s been a video in 2007 that I’ve watched as many times as this recent discovery, “YouTube is My Life.” Seriously. I think I’m up to 19 views.

It’s by ChurchofBlow (aka WeepingProphet). His real name is either Jeremiah McDonald or Bernard Smith, and he’s a former film student based near Boston. (Parenthetically this is the first Google result if you search “Kevin Nalts real name… stalker! :). As he waits for his career to take off (and I’m quite confident it will), he has worked in the coffee industry among other places. Here’s the musician behind the most excellent score.

I’m on a mad campaign to get this featured by YouTube editors because it’s just perfect. Clever, well produced, fantastic cameos by some YouTube weblebrities (TheHill88, MarkDay and Sean Bedlam). It’s a totally addictive song, it’s well lit, the sound effects are fantastic, the acting is dead pan, the humor is intellectual, the camera movements are thoughtful, and the stop-animated finger puppets are just plain cute. It’s a great example of what an amateur with talent can do with scarce resources.

Here’s another one we seem to be watching some what obsessively (Farting Elves from JibJab).

Coming Soon: Best of Nalts DVD

Best of Nalts DVD sleeve

HappySlip is selling “best of” DVDs, so I had to do it too. I may not be as hot, but at least I’m not as funny.

I’m using CreateSpace because it looks easy, and a couple others have used it. Anyone use ’em? I didn’t realize, until I’d started my account this morning, that it’s an Amazon company. Of course, you give away about 40% of your profits (after the fixed cost per DVD) when it’s sold through Amazon, so I’m kinda hoping people buy it at CreateSpace.com. I get proceeds beyond the fixed cost of production and their cut of the sale.

It’s not live yet because I’m mailing the master to CreateSpace, and then they send me a proof. I’ve listed the videos below. I’m sure I unintentionally missed some good ones, but it took most of yesterday just to locate the best versions of these (and some were destroyed by a dead Seagate external hard drive).

Will I sell a lot? Nope. There’s not a huge market to purchase amateur video content — especially when you can see it free online. Maybe some people will be compelled by the notion of seeing the videos in high resolution and without ads.

I was impressed with how good some of them look on an HDTV (after I’ve been used to seeing them on YouTube all grainy and compressed). You notice little things- like the name of a book on a bookshelf that was otherwise obscure. And you can why my face was made for low-resolution video.

Price point is $19.99, but most of the revenue goes to CreateSpace and Amazon. Well- if I make $100 on total sales, it’s worth being called a sellout.

The videos:
Farting in Public
Airport Crawling
Computer Falls
Cash to Buzz
Drunk Interviews
America’s Bloopers
Fast Food Outsourcing
Candy Swiper
Google Head
Google Earth
GPS with PMS
Mall Pranks
Killer Weed
Gum Tree
Coffee Baby
Banana Man
Garage Sale
Kids Steal Van
Lay Me Off
Mad Turkey
Viral Video Genius
Chicken Prank
Stupid Computer
HappySlip’s Pad