I Broke Twitter

September 23, 2009

the tweets that killed twitter

“We regret to announce that Twitter is temporarily over capacity,” said David Scheyd, director of communications for Twitter. “Apparently Kevin Nalty (aka Nalts) began Twittering so frequently, our spam bots thought it was a virus and protected itself from a potential compromise.”

Nalty, who tweeted about 48 times in the past several hours, said it was “an accident.”

“I just got a little carried away. I felt lonely and wanted to connect and promote myself shamelessly. Plus I was on a roll with fake articles, fake URLs, poop tweets, and even a public battle with some psycho chick from Jersey,” said Nalty in a faxed statement.

Twitter evil birds flying off with whale carcass

Twitter evil birds flying off with whale carcass

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Comments Closed

{ 15 comments }

1 NutCheese September 23, 2009 at 3:20 pm

I just took a huge tweet in my pants.

2 RetroRobino September 23, 2009 at 3:39 pm

Leave it up to Nalts to take down a whole social networking site.

3 Nalts September 23, 2009 at 5:20 pm

@1 Tell Princess Di she’s sexy when she’s angry.

4 Diana September 23, 2009 at 5:32 pm

hey asswipe I’m NOT Italian. and another thing, bringing up xgobobeans dead dog just to hurt her feelings because you weren’t in that movie is weak. I tolerate a lot of things from people but cruelty is not one of them.

People with secrets should NEVER make enemies… unlike the ice cream man I wont call a cop if you put me in a video again… I’ll call a lawyer!

5 marquisdejolie September 23, 2009 at 11:58 pm

I THOUGHT it had Nalts written all over it!

6 marquisdejolie September 24, 2009 at 12:15 am
7 Alexis Olson September 24, 2009 at 12:27 pm

@4 “People with secrets…” Do you have some dirt on Kevin then?

8 Bobby J. September 24, 2009 at 12:38 pm

this is crazysauce on top of awesomesauce

9 xjasongarciax September 24, 2009 at 12:49 pm

@7, yeah…she does! It’s that I’m his gay lover in Texas! All those “business” meetings he had, well they were more like pleasure meetings. He didn’t get let go from his old job because of his Nalts persona either, its cause they found out about us and his double life!!!!

*kisses* Naltsie!

(Hey, I was summoned by queen of cheesiness to liven up this joint!) :)

10 Alexis Olson September 24, 2009 at 12:57 pm

@9 Interesting.

Hey Naltsie, if you have any more “business” meetings here in Texas, you’ll drop by and see me won’t you?

11 southerntuber September 24, 2009 at 2:15 pm

Yikes! What the hell is going on? I thought I was nutty…

12 southerntuber September 24, 2009 at 2:28 pm

On a non-nutty note, my son was just surfing YouTube looking for Hot Wheels related videos, and he happened upon Nalts’ Gorilla Attack Hot Wheels video. I was like, “Oh God, don’t watch that guy, he’s crazy!” j/k It was neat stumbling upon your vid.

13 Peter Coffin September 24, 2009 at 2:51 pm

There’s a reason Nalts doesn’t follow me. I tweet a LOT. I use it as a means to organize thoughts and get feedback.

http://twitter.com/petercoffin

14 Nalts September 25, 2009 at 10:09 am

I follow you Peter. Oh- wait. I just follow my name. And you use my name. Really I view Twitter as an ego search engine to see what’s being said about me.

15 marquisdejolie September 25, 2009 at 9:51 pm

12,000+ tweets, Peter. That’s a LOT of organizing your thoughts. What on earth did you do BEFORE Twitter? Sit out at busstops talking word salad to strangers?
:D

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